Welcome to my website. I work as a coach and mediator.
The 'mediation' and 'coaching' tabs above will give you more information about what I offer and how I do it.
The coaching I do is primarily focused on helping my clients resolve relationship issues.
We are all involved in a multitude of relationships at home, at work, in our communities, and everywhere else. It is remarkable that we are so adept at co-existing with so many different people in such varying circumstances. Yet, sometimes things go wrong. It could be a short-term misunderstanding or it could be a long-term poisonous situation that causes stress, anger, fear and anxiety.
As coach I help my clients with the relationship issues they are stuck on: You just don't seem to be able move beyond what's bothering or upsetting you. You engage in self-talk which is supposed to make you feel better about yourself but it doesn't help. When you talk to your friends they are in your corner but somehow their advice is often not what you want. You arrive at a place like this website because you're looking for something more: someone who will listen and help you work things out.
Your coach is in your corner the way a friend should be, but your coach isn't going to tell you what to do. Instead, I'll help you work out the best answer for yourself.
As mediator I work with two or more people who are involved in an ongoing disagreement or conflict.
A mediator is not in your corner, nor in anybody else's. The mediator's job is to be completely neutral and to create a safe environment in which a conversation takes place about the origin and cause of a conflict, with the purpose of finding a mutually acceptable resolution to it. An important element of successful mediation is that it usually results in an improved understanding and relationship between the people who had been arguing in addition to generating a good solution.
My UVWXYZ of coaching.
Ubuntu: We can't live without relationships, much as we sometimes want to. My clients come to me for support in working out how to improve specific relationships they are concerned about. ("Ubuntu" is an Nguni African word. Archbishop Desmond Tutu explains it this way: "A person is a person through other persons.")
I'm a Ubuntu-type because I derive great and positive energy from my interactions with other people and I pass it on.
Value: Coaching adds value to your life. You gain insights into your own motivations and you learn ways of finding out about others'. You gain new communication skills that will make the world of difference in how people perceive, understand and respond to you in future.
Wisdom: It is something that comes with experience and experience comes with time. It needs more than experience and time though. It also needs reflection and introspection. it is the ongoing process of learning - about ourselves, about others, and how we fit in the world. My dream as a coach is to help my clients increase their WQ (Wisdom Quotient) and their SQ (Smartness Quotient) so that they can make great choices that lead to transformation in their relationships with others.
Xenial: As my client you are my guest, to being with. We work together, figuring things out that you're struggling with, finding a way forward for you. We develop a relationship. Although we don't become friends, friendship is in there, because I'm in your corner. I have your back. ("Xenial", from ancient Greek, means "guest-friend".)
You: Coaching is about you. For the time we're engaged in coaching my task is to remain fully focused on you: I listen as you've never been listened to before. I ask questions to make sure I understand you correctly. I sum up what you said to test that my understanding is on track. I give you feedback as you progress, or if you show signs of wanting to backslide. I honour you by keeping our conversations confidential. I help you explore and test options. I help you make decisions. And, I celebrate with you when the journey's done.
Zestful:If your life journey is anything like mine, you've made your fair share of blunders, which probably included not celebrating some small surprising successes. Yes, coaching is hard work, but I believe it should also contain great moments of spirited enjoyment. There's nothing quite like sharing a break-through realization that makes it possible to move on and be the best we can be. I'm enthusiastic about enjoying learning and changing.
Delphine du Toit
Halifax Nova Scotia
phone: (w) (902) 845-2727 (c) (902) 789-3953
email: Please send me a message at Contact Us